MY OPINIONS PART 1
This section and the next are about opinions that I have. It was all one section, but I divide it into two sections because again I felt it was growing too long.
My Philosophical Theories
As far as I’m concerned, the main reason it’s not the parents’ problem that either of their two children have started something that has set the other child off in a negative way, is because the Mum or Dad wouldn’t relate to having that problem because they’re too old for that kind of thing to the point where they don’t believe in straight competition, and some of them might have been like that in the past, and now that they’re adults, they don’t get started off by little things that would set their children off.
With a couple that have two children or more, you never get the parents pinching and twisting each other because A, there’s too much love and affection between them for that because it’s all about them rather than about them and their parents, B they are not brother and sister because they obviously don’t have the same parents, and C it’s not really their problem if one of their two or more children starts a fight by pinching and twisting without reason, because the whole thing is of absolutely no significance to the parents whatsoever as they are not a part of the situation and have had nothing to do with it from the start. No wonder they don’t care who started it.
Also, I’m not completely sure if this is true, but the brother or sister that does the pinching and twisting is the older sibling, and that the brother or sister that is being pinched and twisted is the younger sibling. If that is the case, then I think there might actually be a reason why the older sibling is the first to do it, and I think it’s because they were the first to be born and that they’re used to getting attention all the time because they were an only child in the first place. Also, what I think they don’t understand is that their younger brother or sister is actually lucky to have been born themselves, and that because they’re a second and third child etcetera, they wouldn’t imagine what it’s like to be an only child and to be the only one getting attention all of the time. I would also say that if parents have one child so far, and that they want to have another one, like if the wife says that she wants another baby, they wouldn’t produce a second child as a plan to get their first child to pinch and twist their younger brother or sister later in life. Two or more siblings are a part of the same family as their parents, though obviously siblings don’t have the same connection as their parents, so the games the siblings play with each other are not what their parents would play with each other.
I don’t know if this is true or not, but the comedian Jason Manford said on an episode of Live At The Apollo from November 2014 that he saw a woman with a five year old and a two year old, and that out of nowhere, the five year old just hit the two year old in the face, and that the woman grabbed the five year old and said, “Becky, we do not smack people!” If that had been a true incident, then I think that the five year old did it because when the two year old was born two years earlier, the five year old that was three years old at the time was jealous about her mother having another baby because she thought that she wouldn’t be getting as much attention as she did when she was an only child.
If I was out and I came across an incident like that, I would automatically memorise it without wanting to and it would bother me because my head would assume that they would take it out on everyone and that I would be the subject of that disapproval, whereas philosophically speaking, Jason Manford doesn’t get upset by things like that because they don’t bother him as much as they do me because his head doesn’t assume that they would take it out on everyone else and that he’s the subject of that disapproval. I’m saying that because of the way he talks about that incident on Live At The Apollo in November 2014, though once again, it might not have been a true story. That episode of ‘Live At The Apollo’ was first shown on the telly just before I stopped watching that programme all together.
I also know that when Jason Manford was at school, if teachers raised their voices at the class to get control over them, or if they told a pupil off for something they had done, he didn’t take it personally at all, therefore he doesn’t get upset by hearing a parent telling a child off because things like that don’t hurt his ears like they do mine. Another true fact is that he doesn’t have sensitive hearing like I do, let alone Autism. I would also say that he doesn’t fear disapproval, and I’m saying that because he said on his third live DVD called First World Problems that he once did a joke on the telly that got 147 complaints, and that he still wasn’t sorry. The DVD was released in late 2014.
He also said on the same episode of ‘Live At The Apollo’ that children have got some nasty fighting techniques, like for example, the pinch and twist that was mentioned earlier on in this bit. He also said that his two oldest children pick on her youngest child; his two older children are twins. If that was true, then I think that’s because they’re jealous of his younger daughter, their younger sibling because they’re used to getting all the attention, and that because his two older children are twins, they don’t pick on each other because connection wise, they were used to each other and their parents in the first place because they were both born at the same time, though I suppose that might not actually be the case for some twins.
There are certain teenagers who find certain things seriously embarrassing, and I think I’ve been philosophising why that is, and why being a teenager can be a difficult thing. In my opinion, any teenager who is living a difficult life that they find quite boring would make up their own stories and create their own realities that are based on their own fantasies in their minds, and that they’re not based on reality because the kind of things that happen in reality are not what they are creating in their heads and don’t have the same excitement.
I watched a programme called ‘That’ll Teach ‘Em’ back in 2006, and it was filmed that year before, and it involved lazy and disruptive teenagers being made into sensible teenagers. In one particular episode, a lesson was going on, and the voiceover whose name I don’t know said, “When kids get bored, they switch off, and when they switch off, they misbehave”, and at the point where a couple of girls flicked ink from their pens onto the back of the teacher’s white coat, he said, “Flicking ink”. At the end of the lesson, the teacher whose name I can’t remember made the two girls stay in at play time and help clean off the ink marks from the back of his white coat with water and a soap. I’m pretty sure that people such as teachers or parents are not deliberately boring their kids, let alone deliberately making them misbehave.
I could be wrong, but I think that the teenagers who find certain things seriously embarrassing are creating their own realities, and if anyone such as a parent does something that they don’t like, something would happen in their own made up worlds that they don’t want to happen, and would feel like their parents are putting ideas in their heads they don’t really want, therefore they would find it embarrassing. I think that their parents wouldn’t actually know or understand that they’re doing such things because their teenage children are probably not able to explain to them that they find things like that embarrassing because of that, and that is something I can relate to, even though I’m not technically speaking a teenager anymore.
When a teenager comes across something that their parents do, for example things that they don’t want to see, or if they say things that they don’t want to hear, or for example they sing and they don’t like it because it hurts their ears, there is a sense of irrational and intrusive impact that comes within their minds that would give them unbidden ideas that they are unsatisfied with, therefore they would find it hard to handle, but wouldn’t know how to respond to it. I’m not saying that all teenagers are like that, I’m only talking about some teenagers in the world.
What I think teenagers like that should understand is that if anyone such as their parents does something that they find embarrassing, they are not actually embarrassing them on purpose, and are not deliberately making things happen in their made up realities that they don’t want to happen, and are also not deliberately putting unbidden ideas in their heads that they don’t really need, let alone the fact that their parents may not even know that their teenage children are making up their own stories and realities in their heads. I also think that if a teenager told his or her parents that they’ve done something that had embarrassed them, the parents on the receiving end wouldn’t really understand why they would find it embarrassing, nor would they really know that they feel like they are putting ideas in their heads that they don’t want to have or think about.
I also think that anyone who is old enough to have teenage children probably wouldn’t relate to having that problem themselves because either they weren’t into making up their own realities when they were teenagers themselves, or they were but have now passed thinking about it, which is why their teenage children shouldn’t really blame them for embarrassing them without wanting to, and they may obviously have more important things to be interested in.
I’m also sure that age wise, the things that some teenagers find embarrassing, their parents wouldn’t so much find embarrassing and vice versa, the things that some teenagers are into, their parents wouldn’t be into so much. I think the reason for that is because the kids’ parents didn’t grow up with the cartoons that their kids would be into because they weren’t so much around when they were kids themselves. I think that’s to do with the fact that as newer cartoons come along, they are faster and possibly noisier, and also that some people say that there’s always someone faster tomorrow. Cliff Richard said in an interview in 2012, “Within the world of entertainment, when you think of how many great actors, singers and dancers there have been, you think ‘Where can it possibly go? And sure enough somebody comes along that just smacks on something else, and takes it on further. And certainly, Alan Freeman did that with radio”.
With the kind of children’s television that kids were into in the 1970s, like for example, The Wombles, if they have kids, they wouldn’t be into things like that because they probably feel that it’s too slow for them, and that the kind of children’s television they would be into would be faster as some sort of progression, whereas for their parents, it would probably be too fast for them because they were children in the 1970s, whereas their children were obviously not around then.
I think the things that some kids would make up in their own heads, their parents wouldn’t make up in their heads, and once again vice versa, and I think that with some parents that used to do it themselves when they were younger, the things that were important to them in the past, would mean nothing to them by now. I also think that if parents of kids are into things like nature for example, their kids would probably not be into things like that because at their age, they probably wouldn’t have enough chance of coming out of their own fantasies, whereas their parents will have probably had enough chance of that because they’re obviously older than them. I would say though that the irony is that if a teenager is living in their own world and is making up their own ideas in their heads, they are probably not inviting their parents into that world with them because their own ideas probably have nothing to do with them and are private, and that is another thing that I can identify strongly with, though for me, it’s to the point of self-
I have created my own imaginary land in my head, and because everybody there is happy all the time, I don’t like seeing other people unhappy because how they’re feeling is not a part of how everyone in my own imaginary land is feeling. I wouldn’t blame them for that because it would be most unfair as they wouldn’t know about how I have my own imaginary land. If there’s anyone out there who has the same interest as me as well as the same dislikes, they should take that fact on board.
Though I’m nobody’s philosopher, I think it’s very important that word does go out about all of what is mentioned above, and if you are parents of teenaged children that easily get embarrassed by certain stuff, you should discuss it with them and ask them if they can relate to it, that way, you may be able to understand them much better. I’m really quite worried that it won’t happen because of this fear I have that if I don’t let word go out about it, no one else in human history will. I’m hoping this will help teenagers to be more easygoing in life, because I’m getting sick and tired of parents of teenage children getting embarrassed but not understanding the real reason why, though I wouldn’t blame them for it. I know that some teenagers do suffer, and it’s just not good enough in my opinion that anyone should suffer for any form of injustice that they perceive to have gone on, and that no one really understands why that is. I know some things are best left unspoken, but I would prefer this to be out in the open. What I’ve just said does rhyme though I’m nobody’s poet.
It’s no wonder teenagers are not being understood by anyone, let alone their parents, when they get embarrassed easily because even at the right time when they are getting the right amount of attention from them that suits them, they probably wouldn’t be able to explain to them about what is being mentioned in the first ten paragraphs of this section. With me writing this whole part down, though not all in one go, I am able to put into words what some adolescents or teenagers may not able to express to anyone, and I think it’s very important that this becomes common knowledge soon so that there’s more understanding of some teenagers’ difficulties. Let the word spread out about it.
I want to make a difference with this one, and hopefully make being a teenager easier than it is and always has been. I think this might add some extra history in the making. Also, if ever this does become a well known fact, we may have to think about all the former teenagers who found being a teenager a difficult thing, but the reason had never been understood by anyone. It would personally be a privilege for me if I do make a difference with what is mentioned above. I also feel that it’s the key to getting parents to understanding their teenage children much better. I’m hoping for a new era in teenage revolution to begin with this, and I’m hoping that it will be the answer to all teenagers’ problems. It may actually be a chance of a lifetime for me.
Here’s the plan, and I’m a big fan of this, if you are parents of teenaged children and they get embarrassed easily and you don’t fully understand them, you should discuss it with them, and if you are friends on Facebook with anyone who are parents of teenaged children themselves, and their teenaged children get embarrassed easily and they’re not fully sure why, you should put a link to my website on their home pages and get them to read this bit about why I think that some teenagers get easily embarrassed, and let it spread throughout. The link is www.perceptionsofderekrogers.co.uk and remember as well to let them know that this bit about why I think it is that certain teenagers get easily embarrassed is ‘Part 2’ of the bit in the section ‘My Opinions’ called ‘My Philosophical Theories’.